When I was younger, hell, who am I kidding, I still do it, I had this habit of believing lyrics. Not just believing that they came from somewhere or that they weren't just a load of crock, but believing that they were True in some way. That if I related to a song, I had to relate to it completely. So I believed a lot of lyrics. I felt how the lyrics did, I held the same sentiment as them and would be bothered and happy about the same things. The contents of lyrics would be normalized for me so that they sounded completely reasonable and normal, and it was other stuff that felt false.
This probably would have been, like, REALLY bad if I listened to like, Ke$ha or something when I was 14, or, you know, if Ke$ha hasn't been pre-pubensent when I was 14. But I listened to punk and ska. My favourite band was, bar none, Less Than Jake. Everyone knew this. I had a huge LTJ magnet on my car in 12th grade. I once did a bet with a friend to wear nothing but LTJ t-shirts for an entire week. I wore an LTJ t-shirt when I moved into res in 1st year just to make myself feel more comfortable. I had all of their albums. I has the cereal box. I had the Anthem 7" singles with printed on vinyl artwork. I had the Evolution Kid action figure. I even collected a handful of Pex dispenses because of their album titles. Heck, I still like 50s and 60s style cartoons and Lichtenstein because of the artwork from a couple of their albums. I spent 30$ a cd when I was 14 because I HAD to own them all. I would go for weeks on end without listening to anything else. I have a sketchbook with nothing in it but the complete lyrics to every song they had. I got upset when I couldn't order an import of a UK only release of a compilation that had live recordings. I have been to something like a dozen of their concerts. And I ALWAYS knew the lyrics to EVERY SINGLE SONG. My bff likes them just because she got stuck listening to them constantly.
And then, something happened at some point. I just kind of stopped listening to them. I had cut way back when I started listening to indie and folk, but then I felt too old to listen to it. I missed a concert that I knew about because I didn't feel like it. Then I kind of felt like the 15 year old me would be extremely disappointed and would take me down in a mosh pit. Which would probably have been true either way, really. I do not have the energy for that stuff anymore. Man does it take it out of you.
But really, a lot of the reason why I stopped listening to LTJ was, actually, that I didn't need to anymore. Not some stupid, "I had to like a cool band, so I picked them," kind of "need to" but rather, that listening to them gives you certain goals and expectations and things to avoid in life. Their songs are about the people they know, where they live, and how they feel about their lives. Example. But really, their songs are about feeling stuck and being in the same place you've been in since you were in high school. So my big goals at age 17 were: Don't be a town-y, Don't get stuck in my hometown, Don't be friends with the same people you've always been friends with just because they're still there, and Don't be the same person at 26 as you were at 16. Not generally the same, but the exact same person. That is to be avoided. I had (and have, actually) a huge town-y complex because of LTJ. You know what though? I was so desperate to do those things, to achieve those goals above anything else, that they were my main motivations for a lot of things. And I achieved every single one of those goals by age 18. I lived at school when I went to university. I actually moved away after 4 years of talking about it. No commuting for me. I stopped quickly and then slowly hanging out with anyone I knew in HS. I know only know a handful of people, and even then, much of our relationships are via facebook and text messages. And I currently do not live in the same province as anyone I knew in high school. And by the age of 18 I was significantly different than I was at 16. I'm not 26 yet, and I still smile when I see kids who are how I was, I find them adorable, and while sure, there are plenty of things that carried over, I am not that kid anymore. In so many many ways. And its for the best. It really is.
So now when I listen to Less Than Jake, sure, I understand what they mean and what they're talking about, but I also feel like I did it. I got out and past it and I don't feel that way anymore. There were plenty of times that I felt like I would never not feel like that anymore. But now, I don't know. I just don't. Don't get me wrong though, I would never go back.
-K
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