Geek-tastic Crushes

To My Youngers,

I kind of adore geeks. Nerds. Whatever.

I don't necessarily mean the kind that wear glasses and read comic books (though those two things do also happen to be characteristics of some of the geeks I enjoy...), I don't necessarily mean the kind that are super smart (though again it doesn't hurt...), but I do mean, definitely necessarily, the kind who get very excited about things.

Not all things. They don't have to, y'know, love everything in existence to an untold and all consuming level (in fact that would be a little disturbing and more than a little annoying). But they do have to really love the things they love. And why does that make someone a geek? Well I guess strictly speaking it doesn't, except for when the things that they love are geeky. Then obviously that makes them a geek... seems pretty self evident. Actually scratch that. I would argue that being a geek is really actually a product of loving something so completely, so all-consumingly that your excitedness is absolutely baffling to most people around you... Back to that in a minute.

Aaaaaaaaaaaanyways. I am reminded of my fixation with geeks (re-reminded?) due to many recent events, only some of which I am about to mention, but the closest one being once again staying up till the wee hours watching old vlogbrothers videos.... specifically the John ones. Because I kind of totally love John Green. In fact I'm not really sure how everyone doesn't love John Green... maybe they've never heard of him? That would be a good reason. Pretty much the only good reason I can think of... ;o) He writes things that just make everything in the world seem kind of beautifully awesome. He gets upset about things that should be gotten upset about and happy about things that are silly or wonderful or weird enough to be the best things to be happy about, and as F Scott Fizgerrald says in the Great Gatsby, he has "an extraordinary gift for hope." An excitedness about life, or at least lots of things in life, that comes through in pretty much everything he says, and perhaps even more so how he says it. Watching him talk about stuff (really just anything, any stuff at all) makes me feel excited about all  of the things I get excited about. Excited about making things and creating and springboarding things or ideas or drawings or just happiness, out into the world just because I can. Just because I'm alive and I can. And why not? What better reason is there to share things that make you happy? Because you can. Best reason of all.

So this brings me back to geekdom. Sometimes I find it difficult to reconcile the common geek-thing of loving things that really don't "matter"(like movies or comic books or music...) with feeling like life really ought to matter. Because surely it wouldn't exist without mattering of some kind...? Surely mattering is the reason for the existence of life. Of everything... Mattering in some way. In some way. In some way. right? So why not in that way?

Why not in the loving of something so completely that it makes you happy just experiencing it? In being filled with joy at watching The Decemberists perform The Mariner's Revenge Song, or excitedly looking forward to the new Batman comic, or the remake of Evil Dead... In discussing Catcher in the Rye or Lord OTR (Yes Lord OTR, not LOTR or Lord of the Rings- long story, but rest assured its a geeky one...), in only being able to talk in excited-high-voice when trying to explain why you love a painting or a line from Sorkin or something David Tennant said on the radio... surely loving is reason enough? Is 'mattering' enough?

They say 'All you need is love.' and I think that its true, but I think we don't usually fully understand what exactly that means. All you need is love, love is all you need, but not just that romantic-partnership-sex-n-marriage kind of thing. The love of friends, of pets, of favourite books and pickles and banjo playing. Of the scientific method, the big bang, the large hadron collider... The love of silly things and sunny days, comic books, and great novels, and bike rides.

And geeks.

Love is all you need, so love what you love as fully as you can and don't worry about the rest. It'll sort itself out.

-E